The oddity of Aussies and loons …
– When a bachelorette party was rolling through Dick’s during the hunting season before last, for brides and bridesmaids, they decided to have their picture taken right next to a pinball machine, with being given a half-Nelson part of the fun. They were a bit rowdy and hyperactive, and the machine got bumped, rocking it a couple of inches. That was a novel way to get a “tilt” violation. And I’ll bet there was no “replay” of the photo. Focus ladies, focus.
– This sign, seen around the same time, would be just perfect for Minnesota. At the Corner Saloon in River Falls, a neon sign had the four middle letters obscured so it read “Corn Loon.”
– Three items from parts unknown, with the common denominator being Gopher sweatshirts from a past subpar season that was toasted anyway. An Aussie wearing one of these, as well as a Croc Dundee-type-hat, was in the Village Inn and ordered a Mich Golden. Or as he termed it, simply a Golden Light. Then in a salutation you usually only hear a half-world away, he said “Thanks mate.”
Then there was a guy at Ellie’s, known for a mostly younger crowd, who was pushing 50 and hoisted a beer to toast his Gophers while saying, “Is there anybody in here who is an AARP member?”
And OK, this isn’t a Gopher sweatshirt, but one I wear that was a gift from someone who outgrew it. It was for an occasionally championship-caliber football team, that being Colorado. I can’t believe the number of people who’ve approached me to say they know someone who went there. That must be a lot of Coors sold.
– Another guy, of classic rock listening age, swore that prior to state legalization legislation — say that three times fast while you’re high — he’d smoked pot with Carrot Top in a bathroom at a Colorado concert. But the guy spoke with so much bravado, not sounding like a stoner, that I tend to doubt it.

You never know who you might see:

– Considering that Kim Kardasian’s ex was just in the news about being disciplined by the NBA for an on-court fight, it would seem to be the time to resurrect this Hudson-based, in-flight item about Kim herself, around the time she split from him. A man who works at the Twin Cities International Airport was approached by the boss, who said it was the man’s lucky day, since the reality-show star was coming in on the next flight. Fast-forward to later that evening, when the man was unwinding after work at Dick’s Bar and Grill — and showing off a photo he managed to obtain of her boarding pass. Wonder how on earth, or above in the sky, he got that?
– Here’s another item that could now be considered timely, since there soon will be semester-end, college graduation ceremonies. I was talking to the person next to me while at Dick’s, and it turns out she would soon be wrapping up studies at UW-Eau Claire, in the nursing program for which the university is known. I told her that many years ago I had gotten my degree at UW-EC, hadn’t hardly ever gone out there until I was about her age, and was curious if the watering holes on Water Street were still the same. She said she sometimes would trek down there from her rented house a few blocks away, on Chippewa Street. Where, I asked? I used to live on the 600 block of Chippewa, on the north side. So did I, she responded with amazement. We narrowed it down and it appeared likely that three decades later, she was being housed in that exact same place! (An addendum: A year or so later, I ran unto her again, and she had just gotten a good job with a clinic in the Cities, and decided to hit Dick’s again. Go Blugolds!)
– Around that same time, I renewed acquaintances with a young woman who had graduated from Hudson High School a few years ago — and got a job dancing in Minneapolis at Deja Vue. She said this was working quite well, since she has had a couple of celebrity clients who would visit whenever they are in town. One was Matt Dillon, who had at one time been in the Cities when filming There’s Something About Mary, and the other is Mini Me of Austin Powers fame. I just had to ask her if there were any pole-bending gyrations involved, since there would seem to be logistical issues with giving Mini Me a lap dance. She indignantly said she does not do that kind of thing.
– Another good gig to have, if you can get it. A new patron at Dibbo’s said that he was at a funeral when he ran into a cousin who — fittingly for the occasion — is a member of Slipknot. They exchanged pleasantries and then the band member handed over a bunch of free concert tickets.

I am thankful for the obscure — what makes a turkey stand up amidst more foul creatures, and bringing some noteworthy people to Hudson, whether to live or play music.
– It’s been a few years now since I photographed a family with many celebrity ties, while at a seasonal event in Willow River State Park. Speaking of photos, they ended up on the front page of the New York Times, just by being in the right place and the right time, gracing the cover with Lindsey Lohan when she was a co-star at the premier of Garrison Keillor’s “Lake Wobegon.” But this was old hat for the family, who had just moved to the Third Street historical district in Hudson from Out East. The husband grew up in a prominent Connecticut neighborhood where Brook Shields was the neighbor and Billy Joel one of the regulars — big time — at the corner bar. His brother was on the same soccer team as Richie Blackmore, the well-known guitarist for Deep Purple.
– Have leftover turkey bones? For a long time, the “Bones” around town was a colorful old gent and Vietnam War veteran who would hang out at Pudge’s and tell the person sitting next to him, and the bartenders whenever they would come by, to watch out for the Tree Leaches and Sand Mites that he jokingly said lay in waiting just outside the door. But why stop there? What about the Concrete Ticks? Talk to Bones long enough, and he’ll come up with a whole zoology of colorful creatures that don’t really exist — or do they, if even just to capture the comely bartender whose fate it was to be closing up that night!
– Speaking of Leaches, people are still raving about the recent — and even more song-filled and lengthy — Bruce Springsteen show at the XCel, and one of them, Matt Leach, said a highlight were the frequent and minutes-long tributes to the late Clarence Clemmens, some with his music, some with long periods of silence. Another recent act that drew a lot of attention, featured North Hudson people dressing up as Madonna for her concert, and meeting first over a drink locally to determine just what incarnation of the Material Girl to go as, and then afterward again to both unwind and be seen.
– That’s got nothing on a former bridal shower for, of all things, a Black Sabbath- and medieval-themed wedding. They met at Dick’s a couple of wedding seasons ago to revel at Dick’s by invoking the imagery of an old and obscure metal song, called of all things, Fluff.
– Skuba season may be over, but the signs live on, posted on the wall at the downtown shop that sells and rents this type of gear. The latest: “Life’s a beach and then you dive.”
– With the college football season waning, a reminder was another sign, this one a Badger-booster from last year’s campaign that unfortunately was missing a space: “gored.” They must have gotten blown-out that week.

Politics, again, is the lead in this collection of items from the past that are down and dirty:

– Back in the day when Bill Clinton was president, and was going on national television to speak to the country about his alleged — at that point — misdeeds with Monica Lewinkski, I decided that as a beat reporter I would check out some of the watering holes and see how the Leader of the Free World’s “apology” was received. I took a barstool station at Pudge’s and it turned out the guy next to me was from Australia (see other item under Notes From the Beat) and also unfamiliar with American politics. He was here in the Twin Cities suburbs working construction. His take on Clinton’s situation: If the prime minister in Australia had such an extramarital affair, no one would bat an eyelash. However, if he did it and lied about it, his political career would be toast.
– That brings to mind the travails of one other visitor who traveled here from the ‘burbs. He however, did it via a taxi cab and the meter was kept running outside Pudge’s as he did what everyone else does here on a Sunday, watched a Packer football game! The guy was from Kuwait and was in the Minneapolis area on business — and had money to blow. Yet the local patrons were some of those who BOUGHT HIM drinks as they talked about the Green and Gold until the final whistle, then the foreigner went back to his hotel.
– There are other prominent people who have stopped at Pudge’s and were toasted with drinks bought for them, rather than the other way around. Musician Greg Allman has friends in Hudson and that’s exactly what happened on a Saturday night visit (insert joke about his past financial troubles). Someone who knows I am a reporter looked me up and said I might want to get my butt down to Pudge’s and cover this great big breaking story, the likes of which Hudson has seldom seen. At an earlier time, another musician stopped in, yet again at Pudge’s, this time to get offsale liquor just under the gun after performing at an X-Fest in Somerset. Word has it that David Pirner of Soul Asylum was really stringy with the tip, if there was any tip at all. Word also has it that Pirner has been back since then, as he frequents the St. Croix River on a boat, and while here pulls into Dibbo’s and listens to bands, not plays.
– There were plenty of people who you normally don’t see, out and about and celebrating, the other weekend after the Hudson Raiders won yet another playoff football game. That reminded me of another night a few weeks back at Dick’s, this one on a weekday and much slower, where there were five coaches wearing Stillwater Ponies jackets sitting around a table drowning there sorrows, presumably after a loss to the locals. One of them characterized the lament for all of them: “Conference champions. It’s a b—-.”

These items are looking forward, while looking back, in honor of the Daylight Savings Time switch.

– Last Halloween, while at Dibbo’s, “the late, great Ronnie James Dio,” as a karaoke deejay once put it, was shown on the tube in a full length concert at Dibbo’s doing his sword and sorcery thing, and even slaying a dragon with a saber, the one that appears on the cover art of his Sacred Heart album.
– The Badgers and Gophers just got done with their annual football contest, which reminds me of the comment Carol made at the Village Inn the previous season they met. She was sporting a Minnesota sweatshirt and quipped that if she herself glances downward at her chest, the letter appears to reverse itself and “it looks like a ‘W’ anyway.”
– Bartending can be a dangerous job, and not just in dealing with rowdy customers, or ghouls at Halloween. In the course of just a week this past summer, a server at Guv’s in Houlton persevered despite her badly jammed toes requiring a boot, one at the Corner Bar in River Falls had a wrapped broken thumb, and one at Woody’s in Bayport needed a similar treatment for a variety of sliverings that included a plastered leg, making you wonder if its possible to do the job in a full body cast.
– Just because you work at a sports bar doesn’t mean that you can get away from the games in your off hours. Megan, who works at Woody’s, lives in Minneapolis and was looking forward to sleeping in after a long shift the previous night. Plans changed however, when runners from the Twin Cities Marathon came streaming past her house, and just kept coming and coming and coming. If you can’t beat them, join them, was her thought — at least in a spectator sense — so she got up sleepily and watched the action.

These are happenings of Halloween-type activities past:

– Call this the Halloween haunt of a Houlton hottie. She was doing a photo shoot in a river in upstate Minnesota last Halloween on what was a very cold day, but that wasn’t the worst of it. When posing, she came across a big hole in the bank and surmised it might house a big animal, like a badger. Whatever it was, it apparently didn’t like being disturbed from its lair and gave chase.
– After an Ozzfest show in Somerset, it was time for breakfast before hitting the road in a tour bus. Heavy metal icons Ronnie James Dio and Slayer stopped at the truck stop in the town of Hudson, not long before dawn. I’ll bet their eggs weren’t made sunny side up.
– After other Ozzfests, Dee Snyder of Twisted Sister and his band pulled through Hudson and the musicians jammed with the house band at Dibbo’s, while Snyder slept it off on the tour bus. He isn’t always a party pooper when in the Hudson area, however, having eaten dinner at San Pedro. A worker, Matt, said that Snyder enjoyed the food so much that whenever he’s in the area on a gig, he calls from the coast to make dinner reservations. I wonder if San Pedro has his number on caller ID?
– Speaking of Dio, and as a Black Sabbath frontman virtually a spokesperson for Halloween, does anyone remember when his songs were frequently covered by Decibel, one of the hardest rocking bands to play regularly at Dibbo’s? Decibel also did lots of Queensryche and other old school metal, perhaps the most seen on the scene except for the former Lasher, which dared to try — and pull off — covers of Iron Maiden.
– Did I invoke Maiden? I love singing all that old stuff, and apparently others feel the same, as one guy spotted me $20 to sing all the Judas Priest on the karaoke playlist at the Corner Bar in River Falls on Wednesdays — one of the things that gained me the nickname The Count. (OK, I don’t really understand that one either). A similar request I received at an open mike session at Dibbo’s was to shout out Mother by Danzig — and gain a $5 bill and a free drink. The literally big and scary guys of Ultra Mega hosted the open mike, as they have now done at the Blue Fox in the Cities for quite some time. But not all goes that well. Again, at the Corner Bar, a regular patron and I discussed getting the two of us on stage to sing Living After Midnight. I said I didn’t know it, but my new-to-be bandmate was insistent and corrected my every (wrong) word in a make-do rehearsal done at the bar rail. Needless to say, once I actually got up on stage with the band, it was a train wreck.
– What’s this, death metal in Hudson? Yep, a while back some of the leading practitioners from the active New York scene joined those of the burgeoning local scene for a gig at Dibbo’s. They were joined by locals Devitalize, whose frontman was known for whipping himself into a frenzy by wrapping up in barbed wire, and performing better because of the fervor. It was a night of fast-running slam dancing done by dozens of people, and surprisingly clear instrumental and lyrics. Some of these were surprising for being silly in a sappy way. Similar events have been held periodically at the Corner Bar.

This is a collection of interesting happenings that have happened — and in many

cases reoccurred in some form — in writer Joe Winter’s years of covering the

Hudson entertainment scene.

– While watching a hard rock band at Dibbo’s a few years back, I met a

magician/stage show producer from the Cities who had helped develop the

pyrotechnics and lasers for groups such as Iron Maiden back in the heyday of
such concerts. He told me that for some reason, he wanted to expand eastward
like so many people and ply his trade in western Wisconsin. I don’t think that
ever happened, but lately I’ve been tempted to plow through my closet and see if
I can resurrect his contact information. It was as a footnote to a magazine
cover-story about him.

– Another alumni of the downtown scene, “Big Ben,” is the son of the attorney
general in the Carter administration. Ben always felt that his childhood wasn’t
like that of most people, since every time he turned around, there was a secret
service agent ready to stomp out any danger to him.
– When watching the weather to see if it’s safe enough to go out on the bar
patio, the TV “froze” and Belinda Jensen’s face was stuck in what looked like a
permanent pucker. “Bet she won’t like looking like that,” since there was no
five-second delay, came the quip from the bar.
– Golf seasons come and go, but there still are signs, and we’re not talking
about old divots. I particularly liked this one for an old Green Mill tournament:
Join us “Fore” a tremendous “par-tee.” Don’t “shaft” yourself by missing out.
– The Brewers season also is over, as well as the quips from its announcers.
Viewed at Pudge’s was a game where the pitcher was known for his slow curve
balls of only around 67 mph. I swear its true that after one such pitch, the
announcer said: “See if it’s a ball or strike after this commercial break.”
– Also seen on the tube, concerning the NFL Network Show: “Sponsored by the
Rise of the Planet of the Apes.” Hmmm.
– I’m sure Sarita would write better copy than that. If you remember, she
bar tended at what is now Pier 500 while in college, then immediately got a job
in New York as a producer for NFL Films. You go girl! Take over for the late Mr.
Sabol.
– Lately I’ve been seeing some T-shirts that I thought had gone the way of
those that are tie-dyed. They are for the old Cities metal band Goatwhore, which
sounds bad, but actually is a type of theological/mythological image about a form
Satan allegedly can take and sire offspring. (Or so I was told at length by a
philosophy student seen at Pudge’s).
– It’s been a while since I’ve been to the ballet. Or as close as I’ll ever
get. I was singing some Black Sabbath (Ozzy version) in karaoke at Ellie’s, when
a group of Hispanic men who had been sitting on a line on a pool table got up
and started an impromptu chorus line, complete with kicks as high as Ozzy’s
tattooed chest.