Forty-six and Two makes only 48, but I wanted to go two more to come out to 50 days, (with apologies to Tool):
– A Kozy Korner sign recently noted that there are only 50 days until Christmas — Eve or Day? — (and only ten until holiday shopping starts?), but was that message updated daily, as the days until drop-dead-Xmas-shopping-deadline change as every 24 hours pass? It seems that there now is a village sign ordinance that enforces that 24-hour accuracy. (Just kidding).
– The shirts often seen at the Smilin’ Moose, “The Juice is on the Loose,” could never be more appropriate than at this time, as OJ Simpson, aka The Juice, has been released from prison. Could he come running back here, to get one of those orange-juice-based screwdrivers?
– The long hours put in to create the new Stillwater bridge require employees on such projects to unwind after the work day. Sometimes long after. When the Hudson bridge over Interstate 94 was severely in need of refurbishing, to the point that many bolts were missing from the structure and needed to be replaced, guys traveled the next half-mile to Pudge’s to get schnockered until close. Then they’d have to start their vital work again — to keep the bridge from falling down, although not London way — about three hours later, at 5 a.m. Just how long, remind me, does it take for alcohol to get out of the system? It was this macho culture that a colleague at the Hudson Star-Observer had to fight to win over the crews and get them to give her the unfettered access to photograph their sometimes intricate jobs, which she proceeded to do each week, over and over and over …
– In the bathroom at Woody’s in Bayport, there was for months a big poster and radio ad for One Republic, (it was then replaced with a similar pitch for Imagine Dragons, complete with ink mustaches, beards and piercings drawn on, and then replaced a second time with an ad for Second Wind exercise equipment). I swear, the most prominently placed “Republic” band member in the photo has the same hair bump above the bangs that I do! And that had by a young TV show host, from Adam Ruins Everything, with that one going almost ear to ear, bun hair that resembles a parakeet. By now, going back to the bands, if I could only sing something other than metal … And, it should be noted, the pitchster/owner for Second Wind is now shown sporting a hat the covers his slight baldness.
– One of those TV sports networks that are omnipresent at local sports bars said that two batters “each struck out swinging to end the game.” Were they at the plate at the same time? Or, does this give whole new meaning to the idea of switch hitting, with batters on both the left and right sides of the plate at once?
– Blue Light special in aisle one! Or should I say blue, or “Bud,” can? The 24-hour Freedom Value Center in North Hudson had for days, just a few feet from their front door, a shopping cart full of deep discounts on canned beer and things like it, just in case you needed to top off your night — as long as its before midnight. Bet it goes fast, maybe a bit faster than a similar special a few months back that featured in an equally prominent place a rack of summer dresses. A clerk confirmed the demand for the discounted liquor, saying someone came in and bought out half of what was in the cart. So, the staff has needed to replenish and replenish … And everything indeed sold well, with the possible exception of 40-ounce bottles of Olde English going for 79 cents, (until I snapped them up).
– Do you remember the hard rock group Clutch, which had Twin Cities ties that go back a couple of decades? Erik Raley, a Dick’s stalwart, and I had some conversations about their lyrics back then, but they never really did make it nationally, except in their specific genre. But now I swear they’re back, in the form of background music for Arby’s new BBQ sandwich made with Kentucky bourbon whiskey. Sounds like a good chaser after a night out.
– The bars I have been in, they open the bottle for you and bring it to you without the cap, someone said. So you can’t win the game where there might be something printed under the cap? Oh no, not in Hudson haunts.