Beyond the basics of metal lyrics writing — how to avoid what I call mere “generic insight” and other descriptive terms, so you can pen more descriptively — create not just hymns. Though my plays on words include changing, for effect, “incognito” to “hymncognito” or “himcognito.” You note the irony; not see below. You won’t believe the twist I gave to anti-war anthem War Pigs. Needs more than one (with dramatically changed up rhyming) chorus. Using barrels, harrow, marrow. Curious?

Twenty-one of you readers, the number of years you often need to get into a show, chimed in the other day, wanting to know things like how they could get more information, if I had other websites, and even if they could serve an apprenticeship or share links.

You have been writing and now I have answered.
I will soon be offering a secondary website for exclusives, more detailed and comprehensive information on concerts, and “the rest of the story,” as well as supplying a link to receive a handbook for writing your own song lyrics.
I will also go so far as to give my email for feedback: joewint52@gmail.com.
Here’s another snippet of what you can expect soon.
In lyrics, there is always the play on words, and cautiously forming new ones, ala Dani Filth. And in enters, sorry … religion. Write say, Hymncognito. Or Himcognito. Notice the distinction?
And the dichotomy? After all, incognito means not to be seen as a person, but the prefix “him” produces irony as it indeed establishes oneself as a person. And the prefix “hymn” implies a title given.
Some ideas are OK, but really pretty easy. Maybe just in essence, lyrical filler. Until they are extended. But then they can become virtuosic. I will, later on, show you the difference. I’ll start with generalized warfare lyrics … and there are many examples to pick out, but here’s one. “In the fields the bodies burning, as the war machine keeps turning.” Why not sing, on alternating choruses, to get in a series of stronger words that say basically the same thing, “singe with both barrels, with aim to maim and harrow,” and then change it to, “churn with all barrels, take aim to rip up the marrow. As we plunder, lives go asunder. Your’s too, bloody now sliced flesh extracted from bone.”
I borrowed that intro line from War Pigs, to give my example, and that’s the title of the Black Sabbath anti-war anthem, (hey they only had two words to choose from in naming it), and it starts out in that rather simple vein but then goes much further.
And then there is what I term generic insight. As an example, about the fiery crash of a slow-moving hydrogen blimp with untested design, citing what led to it, “and the engines did run, to the moon and the stars, what have we done?” Especially at the the phrase’s start and finish, it just fills wording gaps.
How about expounding further: “Plod southward newly leaking pod, put your best foot forward, but after the craft rises to full arch, it’ll arc and burn. Keep everyone on their toes, from an even-keel-heal?” Note the five-fold podiatry wording. (I must say that with both examples, there is the constraint of referencing well-known but cliche phrases. But these do produce a grounding effect for the lyric lines.)
Songwriters also play with plurals, or not.
Enter classic Iron Maiden: “Spy you with his eye.” Or is it eyes. As in that case, they are farther open, with more than one. And could be sung, to see more than just a single thing: “The eyes, they peered separately, perplexed with a pair of scenarios.” Notice that I did not say “and they were perplexed,” as those would be unneeded words.
Then there is more “secondary rhyming,” as also shown in the Iron Maiden line, “a terrible curse, a thirst had begun.” Not just at end of each line, but two such tricks in three words.
You don’t say just horse and horsemen, as in those often referenced Biblical four, but maybe steed and stallion, or to throw in terms I have written — I will give you this bit of a teaser, that being ponymen or even better Shetland-small-squires, as a difference.
Then to again invoke the spiritual, there is brilliance but also what is sometimes just simplistic prayer stances — and I’ll show you the difference in the upcoming handbook.
For instance the line, “get on my knees and pray,” from The Who and others. (They do save it a bit by adding, they hope, “We won’t get fooled again.”) It can go a lot deeper then that. Rather from Judas Priest and one of their messiah songs, “Down on your knees, Repent if you please.” A bit more poetic, and biting and punchier. And I’ll go even deeper with you.
So much more coming. Thanks. Joe.

Share the Post:

Related Posts

As the months turned, this is the season for truck and tractor pulls, (and corn feeds, too, all around), and this time around moreso, the kids are all right and cooking and taking the reins, as this weekend in Hammond Heartland Days, in the heart and center of St. Croix County. To that early-in-statement end, there is a truck and tractor pull At The Days, but don’t diss or miss it, it is not necessarily for these huge hulksters seen on ESPN lunking things like a semi and than climbing (aboard) up the steps of a set of bleachers to...
At the GasLite Bar and grill grounds in Ellsworth will commence in style the fourth annual TRIMBELLE DAYS event, running Aug. 1 and 2, with a noon Saturday start slated for the tractor pull (registration begins 90 minutes earlier) featuring antique and farm stock and shortly afterward Eddie’s acoustic solo act with a 1-3 p.m. outdoor bar and a Sunday, UTV Ride at 11 a.m. That’s followed up in a like minded way by the Saturday, Aug. 8 Hogs For Heroes with a presentation of keys ceremony at 12:30 p.m. with a Wisconsin veteran recipient getting Back to The Road with the healing gift...
A snapshot from the hampered heartland. Where the music won’t play for days anymore. This just in, an old shack located at 1 Terra Parma in Indiana will cost you $2K a month to rent. Hey, you could get a mortgage, with such dirty deeds done dirt cheap. The good news is that it includes utilities; but there’s no AC. That old tack is an old joke, but the rest of this isn’t. To get there, you are bus riders on the storm, and it’s a bad one, as when the greyhound grey line is nearly full on a Tuesday...
In a recent Minnesota Twins game, there were, what, eight of them runs that were doubled as they are Twins, as the home team led 16-0 after five innings, as viewed at Hudson Tap. This is not U.S. football with a couple of two-point conversions, and certainly not futbal, though they televise a lot of soccer. If there ever was a reason to invoke the old high school baseball and softball mercy rule, it was time, and I had been on both sides of that many a time back in my playing days. (The other pro ball squad shortly afterward...
I wonder if they celebrated in Belgium like they did in the U.S., in advance, partying in the streets with maybe rioting coming later, prior to the win of the former over the latter in the mere — but still highly publicized, even here — quarterfinals of the FIFA World Cup that would continue on for another two weeks or so, then bow out soon after killing the U.S. hopes. The Elite Eight, if I can borrow a term from NCAA basketball, can be a bitch. First term, not second one. Wait, isn’t that a political reference? Anyway, they are...
With the Full Tilt Boogie, the Friday and Saturday choppers/vans/bands/camping event at The Gaslite near Ellsworth, they offer us a lesson in not only music with the likes of Janis Joplin references and also the road running machines and what they’ll bring to the frantic jamming, but the sciences and history? (But first, there is a Friday movie and DJ at The Gaslite, and on Saturday a premier Van Halen cover band, Extermination Day Band, (know your history), the Rumours Band and Smokey Mirror.) But (sub)-standard or lesser known historical subtexts of the event title for the 17th and 18th,...
Scroll to Top