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With the dead of winter coming, here are some ways to heat things up, but you need to act now before spring is sprung:

— You never know what you might find lying on the sidewalk, and it could have similarity to what you see positioned on the newsstand, on the cover of Sports Illustrated. All the good looking people who work at the Agave Kitchen posed as if dressed to kill for an oversize 2016 calendar-type poster, and there was one setting on the curb that I picked up, in addition to ones available at the front bar. On it is someone who bears a strong resemblance to the model on the SI swimsuit edition cover from 2015, (you can still get a copy if you hurry). I don’t want to embarrass her by naming her; lets just say that because of her rock dancing ability, she has gained the same nickname as a former Wisconsin Badger running back.
— Another “offer” of sorts, which was posted a while back (unofficially I’m sure) at the Smilin’ Moose over the top of the ATM machine and also expires soon, was for not their food but that of a Mexican restaurant in the Twin Cities. It cited E. Cocina and its drink specials and free guacamole and queso. This opportunity was said to expire Jan. 31.
— This offer will go much longer, until Christmas Day, 2016, at least if you live in the right place. Patrons at Buffalo Wild Wings can enter a drawing in which $500 is given away each week, but not if you’re one of those put-upon people who happen to live in some parts of Canada. Specifically, if you cross the border near Buffalo itself and venture into Quebec, you are not eligible, and you also aren’t if you have not “reached the age of majority in your jurisdiction at time of entry.” That’s enough of a mouthful to make you want to speak French.
— Think your holidays with relatives were bad? A TV trivia mention at B-Dubs threw out there the possibility of “Christmas at Simon Cowell’s place.” It could indeed be “udderly forgettable. I’d rather listen to chalk on a blackboard.” Such sentiments about Simon also were expressed in the mens bathroom at Kozy Korner in North Hudson, along with references to Sick Puppies and Crappy Zappa (a redux from the former Mudd’s and Sudd’s bathroom poster). Hopefully, the grinchlike music judge won’t be that hard on some of the servers/birthday singers at B-Dubs, who in one case needed to either get in a better key or tone down the volume. But it still was entertaining.
— A friend of a friend is said to look just like the mascot of the recently playoff-ousted Vikings. He said people come up to him and ask, mistakenly, that their picture be taken together, and allegedly even a movie crew from NFL Films put a message on his windshield offering a photo shoot, but it got rained on and he couldn’t make out the phone number to call back. More Minnesota bad luck!
— Good For Gary played The Moose last Friday, but the way their band was listed on the sign out front was a bit mysterious. For space reasons, the sign said Good Gary, with the middle word omitted, which implies that they were indeed good as far as musical ability. Which brings me to another such point as far as names. One of the doormen early on regularly addressed me as “pimp juice” when he would give me a wrist band. Not being that into hip-hop and rap, I finally asked him what that meant. He said the reference was from a song by Nelly, and that it was a good thing. Hip-hop and rap? That would seem to befit The Moose.

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