It’s said that a crew of military aircraft, maybe including crewed Air Force One, recently and finally stopped circling about, like mammoth vultures since Saturday … prior to possible deployment to the Middle East.
Crude. With the sparse attendance at Trump’s military parade and birthday celebration and honorary Armed Forces anniversary day, they had been looking for just-where-the-place-even-was where they should fly over/land/linger. They couldn’t quite see or find the tiny gathering a people, despite their bright red ties, even with their billion-dollar eye-spy contraptions.
OK, of course that is a joke. But Trump’s bombastic birthday bombed. Although the streets were not empty, they were not lined with flag-waving faithful either. To find those kind of throngs, you’d have to go to L.A., where despite a watch-where-and-when-you-go and/or don’t-go-there-at-all curfew zone (more on “going” below) of a few hundred blocks and more that, very predictably included Chinatown, people were out en masse to protest during another No King’s Day. (Donald and his handlers could criticize me for the lack of timeliness of this analysis/report/Jimmy Kimmel copy, but they are just too flat out dumb.)
— This is National Pollinator Week and it gets more than a day since, I suspect, I am a Bee and the Black-Eyed Peas are some of those plants being stung with pollination. Thus drop the eye or i, as in William, in the band.
Sunday afternoon is a benefit for Cory Nelson, owner of Guv’s Place in North Hudson, held at the Emporium in the town of Hudson, and also sponsored by Jonesy’s Local Charitable fund, known for such activities. It will help him pay his medical costs due to a multiple crisis situation. I have never seen eye to eye with Cory, (known for his robust girth), but I still wish him well. But with that fact considered, it is ironic that I found out about the benefit by seeing the flyer through the window, on the floor of a local barber business. Bad luck seems to follow here. Another former bar and grill he co-owned with his brothers burned to the ground a few years ago and has never reopened. Relatedly, one of the longtime owners of the Urban Olive and Vine restaurant in downtown Hudson, Carol Trainor, (known for her funky colored hair), underwent a medical crisis and her husband picked up the pace of the shop, but she died a few months later, despite an outpouring of help from community business owners through things like benefits and other direct assistance.
I’ve been kicking this around … Overtime? … The U.S. soccer team did a (ten pound?) turkey and laid an egg by losing to … Turkey of all the (relatively) smallish countries. What if, in a reversal of who is the underdog, it is a puck drop vs. Russia?? In another sport with goalies where (traditionally) there have been only a goal or two recorded. So this could be Beatleworthy, Back In The USSR, and is that where Wild hockey’s Kirill and other non-American standouts currently are? —
Rather, much of the press next-day lingered on the flashy floral leg-covering garb and pink spiked shoes worn by the First Supermodel In Chief, Melania, looking like a bad, too bright bunny of Easter style, and did all but one of the main outlets covering the presidential picnic miss the fact that Donald’s tie was very crooked? One can imagine them in front of the first presidential mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all, with Melania fussing over the tie almost slung over his shoulder, but he had to rush out anyway to greet the legions of followers, who weren’t there, but in his quite decidedly delusional imagination. Melania’s outfit, however, didn’t not leave much to the imagination.
Rock music was featured and we wonder how Metallica featured the fact that their Enter Sandman song was used in an attempt to wake up some of the official types, one shown on camera yawning. The song was played to a much more raucous crowd of 1.6 million in Moscow in 1991 when the Russian curtain fell. That is in this very unscientific assumption is to be about 2,000 percent more attending than Donald’s 250th birthday party of the Armed Forces. Even they hardly cared, their fantastic centuries of service aside.
The parade was largely funded by corporate sponsorships that showcased products helpful to the cause. Escaping much of the attention was the mud rudder called Max Thud of a Spud Pud Dud by Three Men in a Tub Inc.
An image was shot of a soldier showing a young child how to operate what looked like a Star Wars type spaceship, as if such badly-scaled models, Melania alike, could actually fly. Call in to service the much jumbled Jedi magic of Luke Skywalker and duct-tape grit of Hans Solo (Chewy is now in a zoo via ICE) as well as the musical score of Lee Greenwood. Melania, for her part, doesn’t seem to want to be part of this despite fashion, famously fantastic fiasco, finally someone with a good head on her shoulders, but that comes with being married to the Leader of the Restrained World. Bomb the very burkas off of Islam women, but leave the First Lady alone, and the assorted one hump or two camels and even koala bears with Austrlalians evacuating, pleads the International Humane Society.
But Donald, although now basically 80 years old, still gets around — as do his missiles. They as we speak stand ready to join a six-letter “I” country and cluster bomb one of those four-letter “I” countries — and I get them mixed up like probably Ronald Reagan — out there in the other end of the world that we don’t care about except to blow up. Reagan was shown in a photo with Trump recently, with a few feet of much wasted space between them, as they stood badly composed way over on each side. He also was the subject of a patriotic trivia question at Buffalo Wild Wings along with four other possible answers and came in with a patron response total of 0.0 percent. This contest came with a (final) countdown to the music questions, like we needed that, as I’ve always relished more the syrupy sarcastic supplemental suggestions given after the answers. Seems a better use of those ten seconds and could be a segue to that old Phil Collins theme music much criticizing The First Alzheimer’s Patient.
Israel is firing the first salvos and the U.S. may join after Donald counts on his fingers for 10 more days and its chieftain Ben-Ja-Min Net-In-Yahoo said he might go after Iran ruler I-A-Told-Ya Bomb-Many, (the second one). Meanwhile Iraq is wondering who to blast, the Saudis are busy running their international golf tournament and Yemen and Qatar are feeling left out.
An inter-country freeway running between most of them, and having the convenience store with the trademark of United Arab Gas Rates saw its stocks split twice (not in the U.S., mind you) as people fleeing one country for another scarf down with their scarfs down on slurpees and fuel, and the big domino effect has meant that U.S.-led stock markets are sustainably up significantly for the first time since 1999.
Of course the main and ongoing evacuations are by Big Jet Airplanes. The U.S. is getting everybody out of everywhere and the big jet the Saudis purchased for Trump may finally have a purpose. It is said to, just like BWW, have a green toiletside lighted signal in its presidential bathroom, about a foot below the toilet paper dispenser, to drop The Big One.