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He who penned the great big beautiful budget bill still holds the quill. (So here’s my view from the window sill.) Maybe have him donate from his own billions crypto-cash stash the added thousands so many people will have to pay in health insurance premiums. It is not, none of it, despite the lies, going to illegals. So here is some satire. And keep in mind that even if baudy, it is just satire. —– Or go to Roberts for their non-oral or non-partisan or bi-partisan or numerically non-biennial or yes, bi itself anniversary, history rides of the 150th fete of the village, so not necessarily the full bi-centennial. Just kidding. Twice. Or maybe thrice …

We’ll start out light-hearted, if they still thump. The government has shut down and the earth has stopped turning and the sun has stopped shining. Screw the moon?

What are the real world effects? On things that truly matter to each and every one of us?

Here’s what goes to crap as far as nonessential workers. Or tasks. Lord knows what federal dollars will fund, but on health insurance they largely take a pass.

— Those measuring how to lengthen the set limit on giraffe neck extensions are on furlough and those will go without pay, and any orders for more foot-long rulers are on hold. Only one supreme ruler.

— In a related matter, tiger and maybe zebra stripe additions studiers may be exempt from pay cuts. Elephants are also VERY exempt. Donkeys, despite their close relationship to zebras, don’t have a prayer. Since they are alleged asses. 

— Also going without pay until harvest-time, is a study counting the sheer number of pineapple scales on their hulls, across all time before tariffs, and the effect of tariffs, and therefore sales, on such.

So Trump, go to Canada. If they will have you.

— Or go to Roberts, where they have music and munching, mammoth machines, mustaches, muffins (sorry, not quite exactly) and juggling and sewing and spinning and bobbing and weaving and DJ jukebox tunes and more. It’s the village’s 150th anniversary fete, following on the footsteps of so many others in communities around the St. Croix Valley, and its today (Saturday). There is both a wagon and history ride, as such offerings and their tours, museum-style in libraries too, have gotten to become a kinda thing across the valley in recent autumns, and the train ride has actual amateur NGineers (their actual spelling) and goes on again (no height limit) at 9 a.m. Sunday, with acoustic live music by Eugene and Camille following. There also first on Saturday is beard judging (no length limit) at 5 p.m., and with Halloween coming a cemetery tour (no age of death limit in order to display) at 5:30 p.m. Street Dance with local legendary lounge rockers (just kidding) Boondoogle from 5-9 p.m. And more.

Also on Saturday, Oct. 4, what do you get when you combine building pizza, tractors, kittens and apple doughnuts and more cuddles and light hayhem? Fun at the Family Fall Fest Food and such fodder and (locally farmed) Farmers Market at YMCA Camp St. Croix, held for the fifth time, from 2-7 p.m. today.

And if you missed it last weekend, you have no excuse. The art in the park event had listed as such, by the riverfront, in chalk with an arrow, in a couple of places, on intersections with the main drag, by sidestreets, a pair of promos. There wasn’t one in the middle of the sidesteet, that’s for center stripes, and maybe rumble strips. Inan unrelated event, also offered was, a high school band camp competition billed as by the sundial. I’ve no idea what that’s about. But their is an encore performance at 6 p.m. until the moon starts coming up next Saturday, Oct. 11, at Raider Stadium, at centerfield.

And in New Richmond, at the Wild Badger, creatures of another kind. Halloween several days ago was welcomed with a fish-casting-type net/spider web, similar in size, thus giving the St. Croix River and beyond its first actual wharf. —

But first on shutdown, a commentary on having what, 800 generals collected in one stuffy room at one time, making for a one for all and all for one terrorist-takeout target like none other. Like shooting fish or chicken in a big barrel, except their mass takeout possibility is easier than that of a shutdown-laden family with much higher medical costs. How did Black Sabbath put it: “Generals gathered in their masses/Just like witches at black masses … Poisoning their (our) brainwashed minds.”

Contrary to what the soulless ones have said, shutdown is not a bipartisan issue. What are the Democrats so pissed about? Let’s look at the numbers. Families could be left with pouring what has been called about 12 percent of their income into their medical insurance premiums because of the GOP gobble-dee-gook, that’s dozens and dozens of family dinners for this example family making $85,000. That’s what these Godbearer Dems have been fighting for. You and you and you. I’ll trade you my (on hold) new kidney for a few shutdown shekels to get by on.
The WIC program, which jokingly could be called Withheld Income Continued, will be out of money to pay-out in about a week. So I would call for not the Dems since they are not the ones to blame, but the godless GOP, the true bearers of bull shit, to during the shutdown go without THEIR pay, and let’s double down on it and make them also contribute backpay based on every day. THESE are the true fatcats, boiling over in their flab. (As long as they are making fitness in the military into a policy issue. These in the higher ranks, although not action heroes themselves, are used to being stoic about it while taking it firmly up the ass, the only part of the victimizers that is indeed for once firm.)

Still stock markets are up despite more bad economic news about things like huge numbers of added workers being laid off in the most recent month on record. And that is BEFORE shutdown. As Trump non-approvals hit record lows. It’s easy to lampoon The Anti-Christ(s). While news networks that had been truth-leaning are now filtering their comments and questions because of threatened legal action from The Evil One in office.

While we’re at it, let’s ask Dante, with pork at play, who will be the next politician to descend into hell. We know which side of the aisle. Word has it Vance is already there. And to Rep. Cole, of 2,000 year old slaw, as that’s what people will be forced to eat, what has been handed off to the most famous fat man in politics?

We won’t go too far into the new military overhaul, which is like trying to put a tank’s worth of trouble into an SUV, but this to Hegseth: Just go get drunk again with all the upper echelon of the upper brass.  

All this is so very bad, that guess who of all people has come out of retirement? THE UNKNOWN COMIC. He of old Gong Show fame. As long as we are making fat an issue, it’s now made note of the ultimate man of fab flab. That’s The Very Donald himself, who also has made beauty a political issue. Have you seen how obese this guy is? A fat man’s fat. How in God’s Green Earth did Stormy Daniels ever find his unit amidst all those layers of tubbiness? It’s rumored that she tried the other side, with no further luck for fuck. Now this woman is a true professional! Now that the Donald is into deep fakes himself, over a (very badly failed, with the only thing remotely funny a bad fake hairpiece on the lip, Roberts does it better, so read here instead for humor) attempt to parody the Dems, maybe the next deep fake is the size of the presidential penis. More than a stubby pencil?

So Nazi Nation, here we come. A subsequent post will analyze the bull shit behind their attempted shutdown-blame arguments. The GOP has lost any sense of humanity, if it ever had it. They don’t love our country. They love themselves. And their money.

They are beyond ballsy. With balls like boulders. “But we’ve got the biggest balls of them all!” The omnipresent rock band AC/DC invoked.

So tensions are high, but maybe pensions are not. Except for some.

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