What is higher, the temperature these days on the thermometer in your mouth, or outside, on your body’s killer clothes, and possibly paradoxically, on your shades? So I mix topics, again, like the ingredients in those gonzo Brandy Old Fashions that are again becoming the purchasing rage in many parts of Wisconsin and paying their due as part of the economic stimulus — like they ever left?
So, this is the summer of my loving. The second season I’m to know. Since Robert Plant was known in more than one way for his “microphone,” it’s in the 90s for temps, as opposed to the ‘70s in music, so I’ll wrap up the latest sweaty styles and anything in summer skimp that can’t be left go, then catch up with the rest come the fall fashions. So I Put My Bid In to Ramble On ….
Come the Fourth of July, and continuing on, the fireworks are not the only things blazing, except for those babes who are little more than knee high, as yet other turns were given to all things fashionable and boldly going where no man, or woman, had gone before – or at least since the 60s, 70s and 80s. Yet again over-the-top as the revealing wear hiked it up a notch, both in sexy and in positioning upwards on the body.
But back to another kind of sheen far into the summer — starting with but not limited to sparklers, the shooting off was extended and overblown by the strongly vertical up-shoots after wins by the Milwaukee Bucks to take a title — for more than their flash and noise, although they had that on the court also. This went on until games well after The Fourth, and fans in the Milwaukee suburbs continued playing it out until almost After Midnight on those last four straight victories. And the pop-goes-the-weasel-and-worse form of cager worship continues to light up the sky in the southern metro – Milwaukee now, not the Twin Cities. And the fireworks shops, like the one still seen on a big billboard heading back to western Wisconsin, continue to cash in.
So money talks. But it can’t sing and dance and it won’t waltz. So we need to go elsewhere for those forms of entertainment. An online commentator asks it this way, as I start with that woman’s – I’m assuming here — whole line of questioning: Can someone recommend (inexpensive) Fishnet Tights and Suspender Tights? Cheers xx.
Then backing up again, another top online post from local late last month, about fireworks, following up on others that tied in the effects on animals of many kinds, sleep of many kinds of quality and even the nicked windshields of cars of many kinds, was simply, “please stop.” At this late hour, we’re all in our nighties, which in these days of finally getting groovy in teddies, means you can’t go outside to grab the matches of alleged offenders until your tank top is on just right.

And Then It Came Around To Fashion, She Said …

The style changes go to the top, as indicated, and thus the eyes have it, as the big rounded glasses of the ‘80s have made a big comeback, going back months and adding different types of tints as we progress, and make progress, through time. Moreso, this conversation: “What about those glasses?” Pink! “What color?” Lastly, the woman in Walmart, who had the biggest and best looking if not over-the-top, tear-drop shades. I wanted to tell her so, but then assessed her way-pulled-to-the-side-hair and the way of the rest of her dress and thought maybe she was a diva. Then went boldly where … But I accidentally said, “heart-shaped glasses,” like the Nirvana “heart-shaped box?” Still, she liked the compliment.
And leading the rest of the way is this recap of the caps, (but there were none, or few except for that on the one obligatory female cop in the shop, that being T-Buckets with their killer contest), of the many in-costume parties that can be an indicator of where fashion trends are going. These were seen when the pandemic in its first blush allowed some normalcy to come to prevalence, and that of course was Halloween. And we love The Guv’nor, so we all did what we can do, in my case a synopsis of what shook out at Guv’s: And again, the leading lady was in a costume that was recapped for New Year’s there.
It showed great-big-holed fishnet stockings, freckled tank-top-type thing just above belly level; and all-around just lots of Gaps in clothing. And oh, the (stocky) footwear … Fishnets are no surprise to Guv’s, as a good friend stole the show with hers at a previous Halloween at their original Northern Exposure location – although telling me she felt quite self-conscious — but then two years later to the day, at Woody’s in Bayport, sauntered up and offered at redux.
But there were more celebrations of style that governed that night, last year on the 31st which I think was also a full moon. Back at Guv’s, way on the late end, there was the lovely Lana, sporting again her flapper costume. But seen when first walking in were others more unusually creative then something fueled by prohibition at last call, an interesting juxtaposition.
One of the ownership mainstays had a shirt showing how to shoot a combo — mesh featuring holes bigger than that fishnet stocking babe, and scads of suction-cup-type-things tacked on here and there. With logo to boot.
Across the way, there was a woman singing a song, but not for long. She was pushing herself against another lady that evening, seated, then pulling up and then down over the top of her. Another way to get your rocks off as a culture that for months had gone stir crazy. Waltzing by was a man who would be standard at open-mic nights, as they could be found, in the coming months, sawing on a fiddle and playing it hard. Other extended play versions of songs, this time not just string instrumental solos, was featured by the band, almost to the point of some Led Zeppelin live albums where it is a song a side.
Then on New Year’s, drumming home the point of robust style: Seen outside to start the eve off was a woman, one of a trio that was given their distance, walking down Walnut Street (south side) sporting extra-clunky heels that were still strappy with many strings, way up her ankles. This set that particular ensemble apart from all those soon-to-be-trite, ripped-cut-sideways jeans seen that night, and later was pre-empted by views of shoes composed only of several leather straps on each that were not even the width of a man’s belt.

An ongoing CNN series on the history of the sitcom had this to say: When things get more serious, Americans get silly. So here goes more gallows humor. Is this me being warm and fuzzy, with forked tongue or that utensil stuck in it, and would that lead to another infection? So ever listen to Pantera and their version of tough love? It takes all kinds, especially in today’s world.

So here‘s my take, again, on The Ways Of The World, that I hope will bring a sort of dark-humor cheer. I just hope I don’t go for that wide open neck that has a jugular, as rigidly as say, Stephen Colbert.

The new form of fake ID is to prove not your age, but your vaccination or testing status, as these figments of fictionalizing your position are popping up in many places. And we can’t say this one is from us being, geographically, close to the border But south of the border? From Canada? Can we learn a thing or two?.
And could we pump up the prize that’s an incentive for getting a shot, by offering a shot when going out in the areas where masks are needed most, pull one down and scarf up a chaser of whiskey? I do realize that these days, a free drink like the one your favorite barkeep used to throw toward a regular like you, so they could throw one back on the house, went out the window in about 2007 – remember what happened then!
But bring back the banana brigade, that is like the one that got you inside Dibbo’s for free back in the day, as a form of charity to replace the fourth stimulus check, but I’m afraid would only be allowable if you got tested first. Or twice, as in a Friday-Saturday night.
Could hospitals that are less taxed by the virus, if only to a degree, like those up our way, fill in some of the slack? But if those chose to be this noble, would people rebel, with a pushback like that seen when Hudson weighed in on becoming a sorta super sanctuary city? Think that would have out-strapped capacity for services. And then add on Haiti and Afghanistan.
It is kind of fitting that the place the Delta variant is making the most headway is a place where there is indeed a delta, and because of lack of vaccinations a state of emergency – the state of Louisiana. And in India, where the new Delta variant got much of its start, there is New Delhi. Lord knows, it might be safer there now.
A new school of thought on schools where there should be such thought. The School of Rock should disallow body surfing if not vaccinated. And this time around upping the ante to provide enforcement, by bringing in security by the Hell’s Angels, is a legitimate need. Does their leather mandate apply to masks? Only symbolic death at the death metal concert.
Another school going all out gonzo in their take on whether masks should be mandatory. After, and maybe because of, such a long run at the box office, the Old School superheros will soon retire from the rigors of film-making, instead setting up their own all-star academy to teach the lessons learned from all those sequels to those who will pick up the torch and run with it. But all will be required to wear masks, whether in the classroom or more likely, doing their good deeds out on the street, saving the world in two different ways over which to marvel. That mandate goes 24/7, as you never know when a damsel will be in distress. And who is in a better position to lead social distancing by example then Spiderman, who isn’t near anyone when swinging between skyscrapers. But as far as vaccinations? This is the one thing Ironman could not get done, as his unpierceable skin is obviously made of, what? Metal.
And not matter what your status of “motivation” is at concerts, forget about pulling off your panties, and even more importantly, don’t you dare throw your mask at the lead singer. A saving grace involving the lotsa people at Lollapalooza, most of those singers are just too scrawny and aren’t that hot anyway.
The kill count from the Deer District crowding is rising, surpassing that of the November hunt even though we’re not to that month yet. Need more of the doe than dough, feet on the floor, to lead the effort at nursing care – is that sexist?
And then there is the Boston Symphony and the million people it attracts on the Fourth of July. Word has it that even before the show went on, they could only scrounge up two people well enough to play the trumpet. Forgot the chances with the bassoon. And to get that number of players with the almost infinite amount of lung capacity needed, they had to reach out to Wisconsin for – drum roll please – a tuba player. I hope that didn’t offend too many of you, as it is meant to be a slam not on those who are ill, but those who slam dance to the polka, and there are many. Ever see how big some of those old meat and potatoes Germans are when they fly around the floor, and careen out of control too close to Whoopie John? And we all thought moshing was dangerous.
The pope has chimed in more sternly than some of those in various flocks, calling getting vaccinated “an act of love.” So the Lutherans and other denominations – the Evangelicals are dragging – otherwise quickly weighed in, issuing statements saying that they for a change are one with those Catholics, at least their fearless leader, after listening to Schism by Tool several times through. “I’ve seen the pieces (of vaccination) fit …” Why can’t we not be sober? Just want to start this over. And as far as the Flock of Seagulls, it’s likely percentagewise that most everybody in the band but the girlfriend that broke it up has gone with the shot. Even Ozzy sang about that Shot In The Dark (pun intended).

They said that on the medal stand, the Olympians winning gold would have to stand alone, and the silver stand alone, and the bronze stand alone, and the brass – well they can have the delusions that they are actually titanium and merit such treatment. And that they would have to place these over their own necks themselves? That’s where the “rusty” old Irons Up (again on these pages, see the Iron Maiden video) veterans of Games Past pinch-hit.

And that stellar skier from the area whose Winter Games glory were, and I have to say it was tragically, cut short by the Covid? That really does bring tears, but where there’s that life-giving water, there’s a way, and if anyone has the talent to pull off such a Switchfoot, then it’s this Afton athlete. Seems with her skill-set, she could have added to her globe-wide glory by training in a slightly different way and putting her bid in as a water skier! But unlike synchronized bowling (see a past post) it is not a sport yet, so let’s get behind her even though she’s from The Enemy State and start a write-in campaign for official worldwide inclusion, all you Wisconsin Up-North Vacationers …

All of them noticed that in the life-span of a typical teen to get through high school, if they graduated on time and now that might be harder then ever, a newer bug has returned, and it is not another virus variant. The cicadas are back! But upon further review, seeing what new threats have come about in 17 years in our virus-laden world, they hedged their bets and decided they might be far better staying underground! Oh wait. Was that a different vermin?

I hope you all gained a laugh or two from this post, as that is what was intended, and it really helps these days. I also hope that no feelings were hurt in the production of this piece, although sometimes I could use a bit of monitoring.

But with all chuckling aside out there, be safe! And get home and may it be a safe haven, wherever that is. Joe.

(Can’t find as much live music these days, as the grand reopening is not that grand or consistent everywhere? Don’t pout. Go see Poot tonight! Visit Picks of the Weeks to see where).

If you are going back to school in another state, these are tips to do your laundry for less than half the normal cost, as it can’t always be on mom’s dime and using her machine. They could also go for most anyone living in an apartment complex. And if you are not a college-aged male, you might not want to tell your wife about these tips. Kind of like a guy’s way to do the shirts and pants, but hopefully not boxers and briefs, quick and easy. But the creative person is never revered in his own country – or domicile. But still, discuss it over a beer with your (new?) roommates.
We all have been there, the laundry is a little dingy but not really dirty. And there is a scant odor, but not odorous. After all, few of us are pro athletes, as we just watch them on sports TV and don’t break a sweat unless there’s an upset. And not many of us are construction workers either. For us grunge is a music form, not the state of the laundry. Simply put, we don’t get that dirty, even if rained on during the walk/run back to our student housing. So the following is for my niece Hannah, halfway through college, and the need more than ever these days to conserve as much as you can of that quarters fund for doing laundry.
Take that stuff you’d worn for a day and give a quick sniff to places like the pits. Unless they are actually smelly, or stained mildly, consider just placing them into the dryer with those fragrant laundry sheets. And you can reuse them a time or two, or even three, by combining their numbers into what’s put into a single spin – of only about five minutes. And add to their productive life by freshening them up with a bit of cologne (don’t need much at all, mind you, and don’t be that guy), or just a touch of fabric softner or air freshner, then give a couple extra minutes, or maybe even a few less, in the dryer. You also can have added value via freshner or even a bit of Shout if using a color catcher sheet as the base for All Those Many Ways To Spruce Something Up Now That Mom Has Abandoned You.(Just kidding mom). And she might not like it, but wipes, flushable or not, will serve a similar purpose.
Why is this important? If you have a coin operated machine, either onsite or at a laundromat, it can eat enough quarters after a week of clothing wear, to tear your hair out. My method, for each time through, will cost you only 25 cents. And when done, or so you thought, stuff them into your shoes and wipe as you go, for more overnight freshening power, as dirty socks just won’t work with my method, and in walking to class the shoes may get a bit stinky.
And how to get things dry, if you indeed wash them first? Top it off by placing the item on the barred face of the air conditioner in the room – and a lot you students probably do need the services of that air machine, as you are “central” to your friends and family, but not necessarily the landlord. You may need to keep the clothing item in place by doubling it over and thus flip-flopping it once you get to the next chapter of your biology homework, as the basics of home ec were for back in high school. If the lid on the AC is flat, you might have a chance to weigh it down and keep it from falling, with the armpits laid strategically on the blower right below. I know that you as a college student possess just the right weighted ingredient to keep the drying process going, it’s called Miller Lite doing double duty. And if you have a whole six-pack, you can separate it out and place the cans in a line parallel to the wall, and get a second clothing item, or maybe a third, dry all at the same time.
And don’t buy what your new bartender friend down the road from the dorm might tell you, that if you purchase dark beer for such a noble purpose, you can get more weighted-value than light beer. How is all this noble? You save energy as well, that would normally go for running a washer and to a certain degree, a dryer.
On the topic of drinks, and this is Joe procrastinating like a college student on a Saturday with an exam first thing on Monday, I will soon – hopefully sometime in the fall semester – get back with some of the caffeine tips you will only find in places like this. Been there, done that.

Craig Clark’s bluesy voice has been called the best in the U.S.in its genre, and that national appeal will be brought to Muddy Waters nightclub in Prescott late Sunday afternoon. They continue to be bringing it, now that the music scene in at least some fronts has reopened, and in the cases of many other clubs is only slowly going forward..
Clark belts out the blues rock – deep and rich and southern — along with a whole big heaping cup of soul that will rival as a play-on-words namesake, The Lovin’ Spoonful, to bring to the table a style all his own.
He started singing Gospel at age five, when most of us were trying to master tying their shoelaces. Since moving to Minneapolis from Pennsylvania in the ‘80s, and being part of a scene that saw some great music of all kinds, Clark added gusto to his self-taught and compelling guitar style, and dynamic vocals. He has performed with Big Brother and The Holding Company, Jimmie Van Zant and Big John Dickerson, and at the Broken Spoke in Sturgis. (See that, Forrest and friend). Clark is influenced by the likes of Sam Cook, Bobbie Bland, Robert Cray and Buddy Guy, his bio says.
He can also play with his full band, and a sidekick has also been around for decades and got going on the bass and vocals at a very early age. The show goes on from 4-8 p.m. on the 22nd.
In a variety of sub-genres within the Gospel and folk music scope, the willingness of Minnesota groups with big musical ties – think along the lines of sharing the stage with a Grammy winner — to travel to get gigs has been amped up. In a number of cases this summer, such acts have trekked down Hwy. 29 as far as central Wisconsin to perform rather high-profile shows that are things a bigger, local church has hung its hat on as a key fundraiser.

Do you believe time is fluid? And so can go backward and forward, and vise versa?
So here I come again, and here I go. I wrote yesterday that there would be more coming on the front of shows that could be no-shows because of stuff like hurricanes. It was posted under Notes From The Beat, saying more was coming of the sort as a lead item, but here it is as the second one down so you guys can read both (I think I needed to give myself that one more plug).
When your rock show goes electric, watch out for the electricity in the air, in the form of thunder and lightning, very, very frightening. Thus was the case way back when, when I saw Styx play just weeks before their first album (yes Old School term), put them on the map in more than the Midwest. So as they toured to support the soon-to-be groundbreaking effort, what was the venue? In their greatest coup ever, the Lincoln County Fair in north-central Wisconsin, in a county where there are more cows then people, not exactly a hotbed of anything artsy.
But not a name act just yet, so the show simply had to go on, come hell or high water. Black Oak Arkansas opened and was able to do their whole set, as a band that again was first popping themselves up on the musical map. But before Styx got too far into theirs, the electric eye in the sky storm was well on its way, then right overhead. This was about the time Styx, although still forming its sound, was starting to riff on the electric guitars and they wouldn’t want the high-amped-up jolt for their fingers to come from a lightning strike .. rather a killer solo. So the show went on to close, and although potentially in harm’s way, the solos were not cut short.
(An aside. The fairgrounds where the show was held had great seating capacity, even though not a venue in demand but for one thing, mainly … thank God for the demolition derbies and any auto racing that could be booked. Still, people such as myself ran to the hills, or actually the midway cul-de-sac thing nearest the stage area, to catch the first-loud-sound-to-be-found show as the skies grew dark, and not from nightfall).

Gimme back my bullets!
I just did that, and more on it later. But more broadly, this is an answer to some of the questions readers have raised in the tens of thousands of comments I‘ve received.
For those of you willing to write or exchange an occasional guest column, there for a long time was no market for me, for what you would write. That has changed now that I’ve broadened my coverage area and subject matter, and feel free to beg, borrow or steal. So if you can tie it to something pertaining to my area, that might be up my (bowling) alley. (Note the blatant Wisconsin reference). That is particularly true since I will likely soon provide an option to offer additional weekly content – the rest of the story and updates and specials – for those willing to throw a scant few bucks my way by subscribing. And cross-marketing could be valuable and even links back to each other’s sites.
If you would have interest in subscribing, please send me a note so I can assess its feasibility and favorite forms of the added content. For the monthly cost of a cover charge or two (cheap Wisconsin prices) I can guide you to the places where there is no cover, hear about where to go and what to do, get consumer tips of all types, coverage on how politics affects the bar scene and the silliness it creates, and more related categories of content that will be added. And let me know how much you would be willing to pay for such a service – I promise to keep it very cheap.
And on another heading, unfortunately, I don’t know much of anything techno, so I can’t help you there.
In regard to the comment that spurred me to finally shoot this note back, I do have a unique writing style, and people tend to either love it (most of you) or hate it (many in the Twitter generation). See a further explanation, including use of bullets to break up written copy, see inside in the Uncatagorized department.

The Olympics is a well-oiled machine, or so it was before Covid, but nothing could set you up for what it can do for a bare-chested athlete. That was the most dwelt upon part of the TV coverage of the opening march at The Games.
And get your mind out of the gutter, as we are talking about men, not topless competitors that are of the opposite sex. And some of them have trained so well, and reduced their body fat to near zero all over their flesh, that there’s not much difference in the cup size between them and a beer guzzler watching the Bucks (see below). In fact, the guys at the neighborhood pub likely have a lot more up there. And indeed, from The Cities, a close friend of mine is — let’s get this straight right off the bat for all concerned including the above mentioned — good looking enough to have stellar model credentials, but as well was an Olympic caliber sprinter around that same time. Having her type of slim frame is simply what’s necessary to carve a second or two off your time, because there is no drag from extra pounds. And in that case, so be it. Especially when you consider that most swimmers trim off all their body hair to more quickly glide through the water, and that includes a shaven head – and that can go for both sexes.
But the men that were on parade were different, bulking up not down, and showing it off. Thus they were not like the Olympic gymnasts who went to wearing less revealing fashions as a protest against sexism. They should likely take the same tack in their programs in our high schools.
To wit, these guys looked like they were right out of a live Danzig sweaty video. There was one and then seconds later from a different country, there was a second such guy. The first one had also done this in the games four years ago, so maybe the media was primed. Whatever the case, the cameras were on him – along with commentary — much longer than any of the other athletes from any country, including the U.S. Which brings this to mind: Why aren’t we showing some of the other, more buttoned up, competitors and at least giving them close to the same air time, in real time? Even if they are just the ping pong players. (My mom says that’s not a real sport, but recalling our youth, my brother begs to differ and put a different “spin” on the topic).

–News break: It’s all the slight of silly hand numbers that may mean something about the local sports scene, or nothing at all! Make up your mind for yourself by checking out Notes From The Beat –

Some of that, however, is kind of refreshing, since the uniforms of choice at the Opening Ceremonies were drab and uninspired. Isn’t such a media event and photo opp the hallmark of what top designers are after? Doesn’t look like it was that way, just regular pants that might as well be Dockers and button-down shirt without tie. At least some of the colors were flashy, from the top end vs. the bottom end, but they were single colors and not any kind of pattern. So the choices sometimes clashed.
And which was perhaps the worst culprit? Of all places Denmark, and it was made worse by the blah boots. Isn’t that where we would expect flash and flare along the lines of a Jenna Jameson? (At least through the opening credits, if they have those, before it all gets taken off)
There was one saying grace to all this, and it showed up again and again. Countries with a strongly indigenous people. The smaller the population of these countries the better, as they showed with designer savvy and splashes of color that were perfect to compliment shades of brown and green gleaned from local flora, the garb that goes back to native roots, lavish layer upon layer, headgear included. But even when it was something of a less obvious gender choice like wearing a dress, the men were (uniformly) attired more flamboyantly then the women, and the styles sported by each varied tremendously.
And now that we are the point of sports comparisons, let it be known that down in Milwaukee the blockbuster twin-release of Parise and Suter by The Wild merited all of two graphs on sports page two, as the last item in a column of briefs. What was the treatment back in the Twin Cities when the Bucks won their title? Probably more like whole graphs as images depicting scoring patterns. And the Pioneer Press vs. the Strib probably played it differently, for reasons of those few extra miles past the point of geographical things Wisconsin. And stories about how Hudson got behind the title run, just as they’d at times shifted over to Twins playoff hopes if the Brewers tanked.
And psst, hey buddy, did you know that the late JP Parise, father of Zach, played hockey for the Islanders for several years. We first were reminded, in the media, of this now. Like father like son?

They bring to the stage So Many Ways That You Thought Area Rock Had Abandoned You.
The band Side Hustle says they can accommodate everything from small clubs to moderate-capacity nightclubs to festivals of all sizes, with their take that includes hair bands and alternative, not just the traditional “classics” and pop. Side Hustle will show all these sides when they play a Hammond fest this weekend, presenting their “rock ‘n roll machine.” So it’s not impossible Machinehead and Rage against The Machine could be among the musical-style-driven-genres they play and pay homage to on Saturday evening, Aug. 7, in this little ‘ol town from western Wisconsin that could (present great rock) via its Heartland Days, aptly named due to its location.
And maybe something extra on the set list, as they update frequently and will try out your request, and this gives more musical leeway to their lead singer sporting her orange locks to lyrically accompany the four men in the band. All five are pictured in multiple poses on their website, so can see what you’re getting when you come this way.
There is more music in the park, and more events, slated for Friday evening and times to come, and the lead group is going on as an early headliner after playing an opening-act role at Hudson’s Booster Days about a month ago. That is the Firewater Gospel Choir, and its four-tiered members in harmony simply burn up the stage vocally and even on instruments — in a good way — come Friday when the sun goes down. The group’s Gospel gusto should really make this a good Friday in what is the first full weekend in August, a festival-slate date that’s farther forward than most years. The group also is a well-attended fixture in Roberts, River Falls, Houlton and yes, downtown Hudson, looking like the site of a revival.
Curtain call for these pair of diverse bands is at 8 p.m. and 9 p.m. respectively. And don’t forget the tractor pull at 7 p.m. Saturday, which is one of only a handful around the country that are officially association sanctioned, so you know its prime.

One of my readers chimed in that it is great to have a source for what is happening in the St. Croix Valley. As you regulars have noticed, the website has branched off into a number of separate but related topics, all since the Covid virus changed our lives. But now the music is coming back, as I have told so many people, formally or informally. Some of the old-standby clubs have continued to roll into it slowly, but one approach when active with live bands is lining up newer groups and keeping things fresh — if only because getting name acts booked doesn’t happen overnight. So the clubs along the lines of Ziggy’s and Urban Olive and Vine just down the road, and Willow River Saloon in Burkhardt, are pulling in new names almost as often as the ones with which we are very familiar, for many of their Friday-Saturday regular gigs. Hop ‘N Barrel is picking it up too, sometimes on Thursday evenings. But the point I wish to make is that so many are seeing a niche in the market and are for the first time going full bore with bookings, such as all-weekend rock at Meister’s in Boardman and piano music at Ziggy’s by Tim Grady on more than half of the days of the week, starting early. Karaoke also is coming back, but open mic is harder to find, except on Wednesday nights at Juniors in River Falls. You might want to ring up Jeff Loven on a slow night, as he will let a one-man-band-show become a two-man gig — that’s you singing — if you pester him just a bit. And it might take showing up a second time. Loven’s gigs are all over The Valley, but most noticeably Sunday nights at Dick’s Bar and Grill, and once or twice a month at Meister’s on a Sunday afternoon — right before he bolts for Dick’s.

The sign still today, online and at the Mallalieu Inn first stop in in North Hudson, could be the sign of the times, reflecting both ways: You can come on in and have a drink and not have to deal with a doorman. A block up the side street toward the St. Croix River, it’s a different story. (More on that further down).
As the rules for bars and the crowd and its nature came and went, the numbers of bouncers (and that could be plural and therefore bringing kudos for having enough staff on duty) employed by various clubs, if only on weekends, has ebbed and flowed. It is still present a bit despite the lifting of virtually all restrictions, because there still is remnants of That Minnesota Show, a bit like the lawless local days of the ‘70s – think Street Fighting Man, and not only the stellar Stones song.
The key players with this bouncer approach that seemed to be very effective in toning things down, are the clubs directly in downtown Hudson, mostly on the west side of the main drag that fittingly, is closest to Minnesota, and a couple in North Hudson. (Starr’s Bar in particular has been far more likely to add a second bartender to deal with on-and-off rule-driven overflow). Another creative strategy that provides a worker perk and still benefits all: A bouncer or doorman might not even have to be brought in from the outside, rather a cook or server who wants a few extra hours and knows the scene at his place of employment. And sorry ladies, this appears to be a guy’s realm.
But that was now, and the mandatory mask mandate never was really followed. Right off the bat, guys noticed that you could not drink a beer through a cloth mask, especially it is one of those grainy ones with “character.” At first there were the signs on the doors of virtually every bar and grill, or grill and bar, you can take your pick, but they were hardly ever enforced, even when there is this flood of people in the door, which you can understand if they end up being more than one person deep on occasion when bellying up to the bar for a drink. Eventually as the severity started to ween, even staffers flipped off their masks as they ran to serve customers and take orders that require much back-and-forth verbal communication, and all through this process, if someone came inside sporting such facewear, it was a dead ringer that they were from The Cities. Hey, boosts the Hudson economy, which has a central focus like few other cities that spills directly from the bar and grill scene, and related service and tourism and river recreation industries. Back a couple of springs ago, it was noted in the press that the Hudson economy was hit like virtually none other due to the at lack of diversification. We all needed a day-spring, and it came a few months ago via rule changes, as the signs that in some situations barred people from the hitting the bar, that were on almost all the doors, came down completely.
It had been that venues were almost discouraging the oncoming customer traffic, even if they had live music and you know there has to be a few hundred dollars to the band, to meet a 25 percent capacity rule. If you would be the one to go 30 percent, go home, as the joint might be risking sanction. Forget trying to hit them up for a cheap ad. The optimum, obviously, would be to have only a handful of the normal-size crowd of people and have them be big spenders.
And there were workers at such businesses who had contracted Covid at some point, and you might not have been aware of that fact. After all, nobody sent out a press release to do what, frighten away most patrons even further? It was mostly dealt with quietly, one could say on a need to know basis, although these workers who in most cases were under-the-weather for just a few days and then took off enough time to meet the quarantine requirement, would be up front with you after the fact, when they were back.
The bar scene has a fly in the ointment for spread of things like the virus, for a particular reason – the clog spaces in many a tavern where people almost brush against each other trying to amble through. Often it is at a spot where one room with a specific purpose leads to another with a differing service component, and what there is for a doorway would be workable in pre-virus days, but these days there is little such margin for error. Add a horseshoe-shaped area for bar service within that magic social distancing number and also the shoulder-to-shoulder-based spread of impact that follows, or even a bar-rail itself that edges up to a clog space, and things ebb further. Too many tables, even if small, don’t help. And you don’t want to mix in things like a popcorn machine (in often- cases taken down long ago) or an ATM, even if they are single units. One that is harder to help is the presence gaming machines, where a bar is legally allowed five and everyone takes full advantage. Three ways this battle has been won, other than just taking stuff down that could be seen as peripheral to the business, are to move the machines around creatively and in essence add space, have bouncers take their positions from which they survey the scene to several feet away and rely more on movement – with their hand signals over their heads to convey that The Kids Are All Right — that includes limited walks through the clog areas, and put the ATM machine outside the door!

First in the death-defying, and that’s speaking symbolically, news of late was again the status of Zach Parise – but others follow the bouncing ball, or should I say rolling puck, as various celebs in this post today are third-party friends of friends.
First: It looks like a cool store will be no more. There were online headlines that Francesco will be closing this year. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t that the fashionable Mall of America boutique that took the given name for Heidi Rayder, the supermodel who grew up in River Falls, moved to the Twin Cities right away and then went worldwide. She now is on the west coast
As it pertains to cash, with that closure consideration and the fact that Heidi is well past her prime years of earning power as a model – even though about a decade ago, she made a comeback at age 38 worthy of her crosstown neighbors, the Los Angeles Raiders — Heidi might want to give it another go. But this time it might not be the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition and years-running as a Victoria’s Secret runway darling, but just maybe the likes of Lane Bryant, as her net worth as listed online could use some bolstering.
And some of those models wore winged dresses.(But now I must say, and must say “former”) that Wild winger Parise looks striking like a longtime Hudson hockey coach, Mike Stoskopf, during the days when the Raiders were terrors in Mad Town with their state titles, coming around the turn of the millennium. (More on facial similarities, or the lack of them, later down in this post). Also, both have been said to have lost their touch just a bit, at about the same age.
So where will Zach end up? The Islanders out in the Big Apple have seen the fruit that still can be born, and the rumors that come with the annual bout with free agency – signing can start near the end of the month – that might be too tempting for Zach to fully let go, since it could be argued that he could use some hockey cash and maybe even more, the endorsements that flow from being in a city that doesn’t sleep.
Zach’s net worth isn’t bad, at about $8 million when last announced online, (more on that below), but he has a Minneapolis mansion to keep up and a family to support. So maybe the buyout that could lead to the Islanders isn’t that bad after all for him.
The Twin Cities will always be home to Zach, but with that last scenario, a question for his many diehard fans might be if he keeps a second home elsewhere – as in a residence – and remains a presence on the local scene.. And money talks, even if in a reverse way, as the prices at Tom Reid’s hockey bar in St. Paul, and many other venues like it in that version of the Deer District outside The Xcel Energy Center, are far lower than anything in New York City.
That net worth number could mean Zach’s financial status runs a bit low, for someone who along with Ryan Suter inked twin $98 million contracts to come back this way. To compare, there are 20 current and (mostly) former NHL players who have a net worth of $50 million or more. Not all of them have crazy-high hockey stats, but one who does is a household name around these parts, Mike Modano. The Great One is doing just great, pulling in at $200 million.
Those online reports note that one thing making it hard to keep up with a current number, is it’s hard to factor in the nuances of current and future spending.
But Zach, who was still listed as being on the “American professional ice hockey team left winger” that is the Minnesota Wild by Wikipedia even days after the buyout, comes from good skater stock. But in recent days, regarding what’s more prominently seen on the internet, if you look hard at the mug shot of the late J.P. Parise, Zach’s pro hockey father – and we are certain about this – one might wonder at the whole switched at birth thing. But again, highly doubt it. Twin Cities medical clinics are better than that.
And the media can be fawning for a hometown hero brought back, at least until they are about to be released from the team, and that was shown over and over when Zach’s goal numbers first started waning, but it was dealt with by using kid gloves until more brash analysis became unavoidable. Why is it only now, for instance, that we hear the point made about Zach asking the hockey brass to move the team to Minneapolis, closer to Zach’s suburban home?
Now closer to Hudson, and the tie-ins are well-chronicled, if only here, so I won’t dive into them again. Just safe to say the lives of these movie and music icons live on, via filming and recordings – and industry magazines. Two covers I saw on a newsstand, right next to each other, were about the current F9 movie and the deceased star of the franchise, and then the rebirth, if only in Photoshop magic, of the REAL Van Halen after Eddie’s death.
Starting from the left rack, longtime actor Vin Diesel, who has a younger lookalike in Hudson who also does film (think of his name as Karenson, to borrow from the Scandinavians), talked inside the mag’s pages about the late Paul Walker, who is also grieved by a local friend who played his son in a breakout flick. But Diesel’s face after years of frequent working and wear and tear does not look like the one we see on the Silver Screen, and he’s a bit scruffy too. Meanwhile, his latest Fast and Furious movie has had great success, mostly, at the box office, leading some to say it may be the greatest franchise in movie history. OK, but Stars Wars anyone?
On the right on the newsstand, was a great big photo of EARLY Van Halen. How so? The lead singer, posed front and center, was David Lee Roth, not Sammy Hagar. Apparently, he could not drive 55 fast enough to get to the shoot! But Eddie was there, as if from beyond the grave, smiling like always.

Sitting in the sports bar, watching the human drama of being mauled on occasion.
And those were the point guards who never caught a break – except maybe of a bone.
Yes, the Milwaukee Bucks won four-straight to take the NBA crown, but it was an uphill battle, and we’re not talking about just the not-so-sunny Phoenix Suns.
A blue collar, small market vs. a team that has been in the upper echelon but for almost decades could never quite make it to what Milwaukee just did. And also, the Suns are home to a bigtime retirement location and as such a big tourist area, and that means money or you wouldn’t be living there. But I do feel for players like Chris Paul, who now must try a 17th time for a title. He says retirement is not an option.
Yes, money makes the NBA world, all around the world, go “round. So who you gonna pick with your foul calls? The team with a bit more star power, or a foreseen need to build to such levels again. (Note that it had been 50 years since an NBA title in Brew Town. Most NBA execs were not in the work force yet. So no cred).
You could see the difference when That Big Greek Guy picked up a slowly rolling, inbounded ball uncontested in the backcourt – he was the only player in that half of the floor — but was called for travelling for taking an extra step. Compare that to all the times he was the victim of a new and arguably more brutal form of Hack a Shaq, where there was no attempt to make a blocked shot whatsoever, just virtually tackle him and most of his upper body, starting with the length of his arms I must allow, and send him to the line to make him beat you from there and give the southwestern fans a reason to count. (More later on another end of that practice, this time in Madison).
Also blatantly, I have never liked it when moving picks are allowed, you know the ones where the picker moves slightly to the side as a defender fights through it, then hook him a bit with an elbow. It’s even worse when a seven-footer out at the three-point line gets completely stood up by an elbows up and leaning-forward picker. Again, no call, but you can’t say no blood. Just like that high school hockey winger from Hudson who suffered from the exact same situation, but this time with only two ticks left on the clock and the game in hand, so that was pure bush.
When Bucks shooting guard Khris Middleton, who is said to be the Rodney Dangerfield of basketball for his lack of respect from the officials, drove the lane very late in a crucial Game 5, he was simply mauled by not one but two defenders. First, an arm was wrapped all the way around his lower back like an eager guy trying to get too much from his prom date. Then another joined the rough dance and together they raked him along both arms near the elbow, and there was body contact too. What, no free throws, very much less a non-shooting foul?
There’s more, but you get it. Just like a Buck gets a bloody nose.
Let’s call it what it is, based on observations from the smack ‘em up 70s in the NBA and most badly affecting the Bucks. You ever notice that while being a somewhat awkward plodder who couldn’t move his feet quickly, Larry Bird never fouled out? There was a reason for that, as the NBA as an organization knew that if their big stars from big markets were sitting on the bench, TV ratings go down, as television was reaching new heights of popularity. Switch the channel. I doubt there ever was a memo, but the refs knew who signs their paychecks, even if they are not nearly as big as the stars that were being coddled. So its lucky center Bob Lanier had such a big body that he could take a few hits. As far as much thinner counterpart on the other side of the lane, Mickey Johnson, I pity the fool. Why didn’t he find a personnel-based way out of Milwaukee, to a team where he could play small forward? But that was before the era when players moved much, except to the trainer’s room (and yes they did not have exactly an office).
Drop this down to the high school level. Hudson fielded teams that had a new athleticism, and not just the bull-in-a-china-shop blundering forward into the lane by the big girls. But Hudson was new to the state tournament thing (notice I did not say thang) and had no street credit or rep built up at all. Milwaukee was the unofficial sponsor of these tourneys held in rival Madison, and it showed bigtime.
And I as a sports reporter back in those days was kinda naively brash at pointing it out. Much like the thing that got going, in reverse, with that Big Bad Buck at the free throw line. When Hudson put on its feared full-court press, the Southeast Siders struggled. But it seemed no one could count, even though this was a call that is not shirked, and the discrepancy was even more unavoidably obvious. I thought it was original when from my perch beneath the Hudson basket, I started to count, and took care not to go too fast, unlike the Buck’s opponents. And in some cases it’s so clear you don’t need a stop watch. One, Two. Three … Seven. Eight. Nine … Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen … And only then did the opposition cross midcourt, an obvious foul of what is, what’s it called? The ten-second rule. An even at that point the ref a few feet away flashed me a cheesy smile. And this is not a separated instance.
Then on to ice hockey, another sport where there is a certain amount of being subjective. A Hudson skater had a breakaway with the puck and a defender approached from DIRECTLY BEHIND. There is no mistaking angles here, except to the point where the skates could not be right one in back of the other, in tandem, and cause an obvious trip. So what to do? Make like football and tackle him. Just short of a full arm-tackle. Reach around but do not grab, and take him to the ice. And again, no call as the players continued sliding on their hips toward the goalie, still intermingled. And on, and on, and on …
At what point does this become a matter of good vs. evil? Again, this time at the state level, once it finally came to the final blow, it was softened because the state title was won. The Hudson parents, known for their typical wealth, still remained gracious. Maybe that’s because they often have had wealth on their side. Or maybe that fact is how they got there.
Morality plays aside, why is all this important? It’s only a game right? So what if Milwaukee needs to again cry in its collective beer? Sorta that way. But as gladiators knew, what we let slide as far as justice in the sports arena, and who we let it slide for, trickles down to the culture and economics and politics as a whole. Look what happened with Gangsta Rap and its various perils and parallels?
Now we move to a whole different breed of favoritism. And more brashness on my part. I again will not be asked to sing the Star Spangled Banner before games.
I will now take you back to my hometown, where “your breeding” meant just about everything, and even caused parents to apologize to their wannabee athletes about not being of the desired socio-economic strata, although there was that off-chance that prior to senior year they would catch a big windfall. Thus move straight outa the bench, bypass the off-guard position and become the sole person for whom a decidedly non-productive offense is designed. Thus a roundball cager — and not a maker of cages in a local factory – -but the caper of being son of a town bigshot comes back from preseason injury and without even practicing is inserted into the starting lineup. And makes one basket all season. And being neither tall or quick, ain’t no defender either. Thus an oblong ball quarterback, and sophomore son of the man who coached what sport? … Is the season-long starter for an offense that manages one touchdown in a season.
Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel didn’t need to visit Merrill to see that Glory Days and Allentown were no longer. Many of the splinter factories had turned to dust. But maybe there would now be other industries, which were “discouraged” back in the day.
More soon on these themes and boatloads of other Bucks blather from the Deer District.